These are the DCC’s online 3 biggest fans

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Stuff White People Like

Below is the top ten list of what White People like

Hey everyone!! Sorry I have not updated my blog in a while! I have been very busy working on a new project that I am trying to get up and running in the next six weeks! More about that later!! Until then..here are some pics of the DCC trip to belize with Melissa and Zach!

you can see their pics here

http://projects.ajc.com/gallery/view/living/china-culture/

Whats up DCC?

So, I’m walking out of Crunch gym yesterday about 8 pm and this guy forces hands me this flyer and says “here ya go dude, just for you.”  While I appreciate him out and trying to make a living and do promotions, I really hate recieving a flyer when I am in transition towards somwhere else.  The guy might as well have said to me “here, you throw this away.”  I wasn’t even near a trash can, so I had to put it under the window wiper of another vehicle to get rid of it so I didn’t have to carry it home. 

I honestly think his marketing efforts would have been better utilized had he made a HUGE sign with what he was promoting, and then had a flyer on a table or something so I could have picked it up if I wanted more information.  It definitely would have been less annoying.

Whats up DCC? Sorry It has been weeks since my last post, but I have been stuck in Phnom Penh.  Since I have been unable to keep up my blog, and per the multiple emails I have recieved about updating the blog with ANYTHING, I have enlisted the help of a guest blogger.  

My first Guest blogger is my software colleague Andrew Van-noy – Heir to the Ashe County Dr. Pepper Fourtune.  Hope you enjoy his Blog titled “White Whale”…and feel free to leave comments about his retarded and offensive story!!!

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Hi DCC Readers,

I intend to tell you a story today, a story about the people who I can’t for the life of me understand how they make it through life alive, which also includes me. We’ll take it from last Tuesday at work, there’s this huge lady who rides a rascal scooter and wears sweat pants that are size “equator”. She sits in the cube section across from me and I’m mesmerized looking at her every day, when she forces that little electric motor on that thing push every goddamn watt out of it’s pathetic little battery trying to carry her mammoth frame to her desk as she has two bags of groceries from Kroger to eat through out the day. While we’re on the topic of the groceries, she’s been bringing fruit in addition to the typical Hostess cakes and whole roast chicken she “snacks on” through out the day

I catch her out of the corner of my eye a velvety blue wave that is her “dress”, which I think could easily be a blue utility tarp from Home Depot; undulating with every strained breath she breathes as she has yet again slipped into a coma from over exerting herself from pressing “left click, left click, space bar, enter” far too many times before 10:30

The chair under her squeals in the pain, like atlas holding the burden of the earth on his shoulders, it spends it days holding this land cow above the carpet as she sleeps further and further from consciousness. Head sloped down, mouth gaping wide, arms completely limp to her sides; with one ham fist clenching a fork with a slice of cantaloupe, while she snores the awful sound of a toilets last gasp before demise. I feel the need to save this creature from her painful, loathsome existence being shackled to that gargantuan frame, so she may find eternal nap time and be happy forever more; I grab one of our branded ball point pins and like Captain Ahab in his quest to vanquish the white whale, I launch it like a spear of destiny to conquer my own white whale. The pen reaches maximum velocity darting across cubical farms to meet its nesting target. It’s a direct hit, but alas it does not extinguish the beast, no no, it rouses the creature from its slumber.  The pulse of shock surges through her body, nearly removing the cantaloupe nested a top the plastic fork, they eyelids flutter rapidly as the creature wakes from its slumber. I cower like a child for waking the sleeping giant, who now may climb down from her chair and ride her rascal across the 10 foot divide between our desks, yet I am saved by the Office Gods as the creature shakes it off without a notice and resumes munching on her fruit.

As the dust settles I hear the side door open and who should walk through but everyone’s favorite mentally handicapped maintenance guy. No don’t be misguided when I say “mentally handicapped”, the guy is truly retarded, like the dude at Chick-fil-a who always is stumbling around wiping tables and stares at you with that, “I lost the chromosome lottery” grin. Yeah that kind of retarded, they don’t let him do much besides take out the trash and clean windows and stuff; which they should reconsider as he’s a grimy and leaves things more smudged and dirty than before he got there. So back to him shyly walking through our office removing the trash and turning beet red as he grins stupidly at the ladies cleavage in the office. He waltzes over to my cube and does his thing, being the nice guy I am I greet him and carry on the same awkward “Hi Gary”, trying to avoid breathing while I speak, as I am secretly gagging from the scent of dirty diaper that follows him like a puppy.  I nearly avoid heaving until he walks over to the lair of the white wale. Normally the affections of Gary are not requited by any sane women, but today the world shifted. Apparently when a person is so large that they acquire their own gravitational pull, attention of the positive variety is lacking. Gary scuffs his feet up to her desk wringing the garbage bag in his hands mustering his best “Hey, hooow you doing to-day. You look so nic-e”, and to my surprise she starts to eat it up. They go back and forth with one another with the most unusual, unapologetic scene of flirtation I have ever seen. My mouth fills with warm saliva and my stomach clenches in pain, as the “5 Krystals, Fries, and a Drink Combo” begin to climb their way up my esophagus. It’s coming and I cant stop it as they grin and blush. I lose it and empty the contents of my gut into what I believed was my trash can, but nay, it was the bottom drawer of my desk as Glenn had come over to have a piece of candy. Glenn and I stare at each other for a moment both covered in hot barf in complete shock of what just happened. 20 bucks worth of fun size Mars candy bars ruined by 5 dollars of a Krystal combo. I look up and everyone is staring at me, ultimately deciding I’m an asshole for puking on Glenn and the candy that everyone in the office pitches in to buy. We walk to the restroom to clean off and I have the drawer in hand to dump it and try and rinse it out. I feel ashamed and apologize profusely, but I can’t get the image of the whale and the ‘tard out of my mind.

– For more information visit this link.

Always         

Andrew Vannoy           

Next week, Motley Crue releases its new album “Saints of Los Angeles” on June 24.  They will be on Larry King Friday night plugging their album.  I’m sure everyone is all ready aware, but I just wanted to put it out there so you can mark your calendars DCC fans!!  I know they will be in Charlotte July 5th. 

Saturday was the 7th annual tattoo festival in Atlanta.  The Youngman, my neighbor Leslie, and I decided to drive down to the Crown Plaza and check it out.  This was by far one of the coolest things I have done since living in Atlanta.  The young man and I were probably the only people there without tatts, but we were still accepted. It was a bad@ss time!

Leslie ran into some of her friends from NC.  These guys have done over 20 covers for tattoo magazines. This guys crotch grab is priceless.

This is seriously one of the coolest looking guys I have ever met. 

This girl looked like she was in some serious pain.

I gotta give a shout out to East Coast Ink Magazine from Wilmington, NC.  They have the best tattoo magazine in the South, not to mention their Tattoo Swimsuit calendar is smokin HOT! 

The Youngman and I both think this tattoo artist looks like a chubby Brett Michaels with Dreads.  I have so many pics, I cant get them all up on this post.  If you wanna see some more (including the pool party pics) just shoot me an email!!

Wow, so I recieved this picture of Ju-Ju and I from an anonymous source today at Uncle Kendall and Aunt Robin’s party.  This was so great that I had to post it on the DCC blog.   If anyone else has pics of  Ju-Ju at the party, pass them along and I will post them.  Hopefully I will get some great pics of my weekend to post for next week! Enjoy!